1) Mark Murphy – Have yourself a very Murphy Christmas
- The Chipmunks – The Chipmunk Christmas Song
- Spike Jones and his City Slickers – All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth
- Gayle Peevey – I want a Hippo for Christmas
- Thurl Ravenscroft – You’re a mean one Mr Grinch (Video sung by Jim Carey)
- The Jackson 5 (original by Jimmy Boyd) – I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus
- The Royal Guardsman – Snoopy Christmas v The Red Baron
- Eartha Kitt (With Marilyn Monroe pics) – Santa Baby
- Bob Dylan – Here comes Santa
- Queen – Thank God its Christmas
- The Cheeky Girls – Have a Cheeky Christmas
Bonus Track (adults only)
- Kevin Bloody Wilson – Hey Santa Clause (Not to be played out Loud!!)
I could barely get past the first track, thankfully the enticemenet of Marilyn Monroe later in the list gave me the required encouragement to carry on. Further perserverence was required to get past track 2. Solid improvement on track three though – I’ve noted previously that ‘I want a hippo for christmas’ has a real charm to it, it’s added to by the vintage Christmas video. The rasping muted trumpets suit Jim Carey and including a track from the Grinch is a nice change. Jackson 5 and ‘I saw Mommy….’ IS properly terrific, probably best version of that song – HOWEVER, the video fratures the use of a terrible font so it loses all those marks. I’m very fond of snoppy (any serialised comic strip really) so Snoopy vs The Red Baron’s a good choice. Eartha Kitt IS the definitive article with Santa Baby, still better than Kylie or anyone else doing it, I’ve got better Marilyn pics than this selection though – come see me later.
Bob Dylan is always a brave include and very glad it’s here – it’s a lesser played item and something of an aquired taste, raspy and grizzled, throaty and coarse, just like a good single malt on Christmas eve really.
Christmas suits Freddie Mercury and to borrow a line from John Peel (just after seeing George Michael and Aretha Franklin) ‘You know, Freddie Mercury could make any old rubbish sound good, and I think he just has.’
Having the Cheeky Girls bringing up the rear is a better use for a novelty than opening with squeaking chipmunks, although the vocal’s aren’t so far apart. I can’t stop feeling a bit repulsed at the thought of a slightly randy Lembit Opik dressed as an Elf now either, that’s really not how I want to feel at Christmas.
As an example of light and shade – I had Tim Minchin and ‘White Wine In The Sun’ to cover the ‘Aussie’ Christmas angle. Mark’s gone for Kevin Bloody Wilson something of a Ying to Minchin’s Yang on the Aussie culture side, still, it is funny though.
2) Paul Smith – Guilty Pleasures Christmas
This one exists to detonate all sense of credibility you may have assumed from any previous lists I’ve created. Apart from including Mike Oldfield – which is still great AND ITS THE ONLY CHRISTMAS SONG THAT GOT PLAYED AT THE OLYMPICS, BETTER STILL IT WAS IN THE NHS & CHILDRENS LITTERATURE SECTION …. so nah, nah, na, nah, nah !